MRS MONSTER TO MR MONSTER:
Try to be nice to my mother when she visits us this weekend, dear. Fall down when
she
hits you.
BOY TO WOMAN MONSTER:
Is that your real face or are you wearing a gas-mask?
WOMAN MONSTER: I didn't come here to be insulted. BOY: Oh, where do you usually go?
What's big and ugly
and red all over?
An embarrassed monster.
BROTHER MONSTER: Don't
look out of the window you'll confuse people.
SISTER MONSTER: What do you mean? BROTHER MONSTER: They'll think Hallowe'en is early this year.
JULIET MONSTER: You
remind me of my favourite boxer.
ROMEO MONSTER: Mike Tyson? JULIET MONSTER: NO, his name is Fido.
MILLIE MONSTER: Do you
think I should let my hair grow?
MAX MONSTER: Yes right over your face.
BOY MONSTER: You remind
me of the ocean.
GIRL MONSTER: Oh, romantic, wild, untamed and restless? BOY MONSTER: No, you make me sick.
MARY MONSTER: I wish
I had a pound for every boy that has asked me to marry him. M
ARTIN MONSTER: What would you buy a bag of crisps?
FRED MONSTER: I throw
myself into everything I do.
DICK MONSTER: Then why don't you go and dig yourself a nice big hole?
GIRL MONSTER TO HER
FRIEND: I think my brother was born upside down.
FRIEND: Oh, why's that? GIRL MONSTER: His nose runs, and his feet smell.
